January shows up bright and shiny over social media every year. Ads for parties, champagne popsicles, glittery make-up tricks, deals on last-minute flights to exciting destinations for a party of a lifetime… you know, the usual pre-New Year’s Eve party push. However, something else is being pushed even harder - diet gangs.

As a confession, I’ve been that girl who calorie-counted.

I’ve food logged.

I’ve challenged myself to eat less, do more squats, and lose more inches.

I have been the insecure woman who thought her value was somehow tied to appearance. The one who thought a selfie always needed a filter, because all of Instagram seems to be filtered and we’re told and shown that’s what gets the likes.

I’m probably like most women who have struggled with some level of body dysmorphia in their lifetimes. The majority of women experience a daily battle of not believing their bodies are good enough, not pretty enough, not desirable enough, not successful or valuable enough unless it’s skinny or filtered enough.

Generally, I am a big supporter of fitness and healthy eating habits, but I question the impact diet fads, social media, and MLM ‘fitness’ groups create when they push messages onto followers under the veil of being supportive or motivational when what they are really selling are products and the idea that women need those products to be a better version of themselves.

I struggle with groups that challenge people to believe it is the inches that count and that food diaries are the best way to stay accountable. I don’t like weigh-in groups pitting one follower against another to see who can lose more each week. Let's pretend all the members are cheering on each other's success, but what about those who sit back and judge themselves for not reaching the same goals? The ones who silently cry and then decide to push harder the next week, limiting even more food and who eventually become obsessed with a number?

“30 Day challenge”? That’s great, but can they do it without pedalling a product or a social media celebration at the end - which if flipped on those who did not succeed, potentially creates a personal shaming? Can we just support each other to focus on mental and physical strength instead of losing inches? Can we do that challenge without even mentioning calorie counts, or shakes, or prizes for the best achiever?

I believe women have become so generationally used to feeling like we’re not good enough, that we’ve turned it into a self-perpetuating culture. We are the ones that continue to support those products and the groups that profit from it. And here’s the deal, no matter how often you tell your child they are smart and wonderful and kind and beautiful - they notice what you pay attention to, how you define your body’s value and what methods you use to find self-acceptance.

So instead of reaching for a magic pill or shake, we honestly just need to go play basketball or join a family soccer league (or whatever activities it is that you enjoy). Because, if you want to teach your children that diet fads, waist size, and Instagram filters are not important, then you will have to show them that. Instead of teaching them about shakes and magic capsules, teach them about running, skiing, skating, or dancing. Show them your bodies can be strong enough to run a marathon, or do a triathlon, or complete a bike race. Show them that you can live a healthy and balanced life without the need to step onto a scale or post online images in a group.

To be fair, I know there are also many amazing fitness leaders who truly support others in creating healthy lives and help people balance diet, fitness, and health in the online space. YouTube alone offers many great and free fitness videos for all persons. The distinction is in the leader’s education and motivation. While I think we need to emphasize doing background research on whomever we decide to join in a group, we can also look for clues like: are they selling or are they teaching?

Typically these are leaders with a real education in health and fitness - not an influencer with an online certificate by a business selling diet products. I support accredited nutritionists, trained physical therapists, and personal trainers. Those are the leaders we should be following, however, it's not always easy to distinguish honest representations online is it? So for those who choose the online space instead of a brick-and-mortar based leader, how do we protect ourselves and others?

My suggestion is to pay attention to the overall messaging. A properly certified online diet leader will teach you about real food, there won’t be expensive branded shakes, powders, capsules, or other tools pushed regularly. Look at whether they show you how to follow a sustainable and healthy plan for life, one that speaks about balanced approaches. They may recommend certain programs or apps for initial habit and awareness creation, but they also likely would tell you not to get sucked into that for a lifetime subscription as the motivation is to create a habit that does not require obsessive behaviours

In the fitness arena you can look for someone who is accredited to teach in the area they present, but also see if they encourage you to see a personal trainer or to join a community group instead of only encouraging personal subscriptions and branded equipment. Research the institution they list as accreditation if they do so and always pay attention to if they share a message of creating a healthy mindset towards fitness and strength, rather than weight and waistlines.